Adult Humor @ It's Crudest!

MEET SOME OF THE CREW! Spicolli Spicolli @ArchWear.com At the age of seventeen, Spicolli began training with "Big" Bill Anderson after the two met at a wrestling show held at the Gallardia Country Club. He debuted in 2000, working as a jobber for the World Wrestling Federation. In 2001, he travelled to Tijuana, Mexico with Frank Enbeans and his trainer, Bill Anderson, with whom he formed the triad known as Las Parejas Gays Americanos ("Deadly Fighting Peacocks"). They were a trio of masked fools who feuded with the Villano family. Spicolli was Labias Major. The Parejas were forced to comeout in July 2002 and then disbanded in 2003. Spicolli worked on the independent circuit, appearing with Mike Hunt's Universal Wrestling Federation as Frutie Pie. He traveled to Arizona in 2005, where he won both the Interwest Wrestling Federation Punyweight Championship and the American Wrestling Federation Wussyweight Championship! Spicolli is now working for Arch Wear as a spokesperson, doing appearances on game shows, at crack houses, and hosting "my dirty granny" wet t-shirt contests for crowds across North America. Ben Pukin Ben.Pukin @ArchWear.com Ben Pukin didn't have such a glamorous rite of passage as his teammates. He has accomplished nothing in his life, lives at home, has 3 cats, and rations toilet paper. His alcohol tolerance is virtually non-existent and can't drive without his teddy bear, Sara. He's known for violently excreting excess alcohol after consumption during fits of hardcore partying with the technically virgin girls from St. Magdalene's private school. Hey given a choice, he thinks it's better to have Ben Pukin than Ben Gay! River Rat RiverRat @ArchWear.com River Rat, a founding member of Arch Wear, was born to an upper-middle class, blind Amish family; his father Harry Tulls was an envelope licker and his mother, Jenna Tulls, a call girl who served in the O.S.S. during World War 2 (she spoke fluent German and French). River Rat received his Masters in Education from Harry Hienz College, and began teaching in Jackson Hole, Wyoming. He left teaching to work as an actor in Amarillo, and says he found out what it was like to make no money as an actor as he "starved Off-Broadway". River Rat posed for Playgirl after his mother submitted his photo to the magazine, and subsequently moved into the adult film industry as a means to support himself. His first appearance in a porn film was in a film by Chuck U. Farley called Snack Time at Ridgemont High (though later renamed Brunch & Munch). He started using River Rat as his name professionally in the adult industry, after his grandmother was caught in a elicit love triangle with Betty Ford and Frank Gifford. River Rat is listed in the Guinness Book of World Records for "Most Appearances as an Adult Actor"; his entry on the Internet Adult Film Database (IAFD) lists more than 1900 films in which he has performed and a further 264 films of which he was director. Madame Melrose Madame.Melrose @ArchWear.com Born in the outskirts of Yorkshire, England, she left home for the streets of London at age 16. Dancing for 3 years in low-class clubs she realized the fortunes to be made by organizing the dancers that typically provided physical stimulation for their patrons. Not one to partake in those types of services, she began booking clients for her girls at the Melrose House London, a hostel who showed their guests true full-service! Hoping to expand her financial empire, Madame Melrose began "cultural tours" of southeast Asia. After 2 years of good fortune, her Bangladesh government contacts turned on her and took over the business. She served 3 years for tax evasion and was released in mid-2005 for "O-SO-GOOD" behavior. Now teamed up with Arch Wear Clothing, she is sure to "rub" the public the wrong way and spank some feelings along the way. . . . . . . oooohhh, it feels so good:-P